CHOOSING AN AUSPICIOUS WEDDING DATE: A GUIDE FOR TRADITION-MINDED COUPLES

For many couples with Chinese heritage, choosing a wedding date isn’t just about calendar availability or weather. It’s about timing, the most important day of your lives, with intention—drawing on tradition to start your marriage with harmony, blessings, and good fortune.

The Chinese calendar, deeply rooted in astronomy, zodiac signs, and ancestral wisdom, has long been used to determine which dates are considered auspicious (吉日) for major life events—especially weddings.

First Things First: Should You Consult a Feng Shui Master?

If you and your family value traditional Chinese customs, consulting a reputable feng shui master is still the most accurate way to choose a wedding date. A professional will consider:

• You and your partner’s Ba Zi (birth chart, based on date and time of birth)

• The zodiac signs of both families

• Yin-yang balance and five elements (五行)

• Annual flying stars and energy charts

• Auspicious hours for the ceremony itself

This ensures the date selected is not just symbolically lucky, but also aligned to your personal energies as a couple—an investment in more than just good vibes.

Prefer to DIY? Here’s How to Choose a Date with Confidence

For couples who want to take a more hands-on approach, or who are working around specific scheduling needs, here’s a culturally grounded way to select an auspicious date—with care and respect.

✅ 1. Refer to the Chinese Almanac (通勝 / 黄曆)

The traditional Chinese almanac, marks specific days that are suitable or unsuitable for marriage. You’ll want to look for days marked with “宜嫁娶” (good for weddings) and avoid days marked with “忌嫁娶” (bad for weddings).

Modern digital versions of the almanac are available, but printed versions or apps from reputable sources tend to be more reliable.

✅ 2. Avoid Zodiac Clashes

Each day in the Chinese calendar is associated with one of the 12 zodiac signs. Avoid selecting a wedding date that clashes with the zodiac sign of either the couple or their parents (especially the mother and father of both sides).

For example, if the bride is born in the Year of the Rat, avoid days associated with the Horse (Rat and Horse clash).

✅ 3. Favour Even Numbers and Symbolic Dates

• Even numbers are traditionally seen as more auspicious, as they symbolize balance and harmony.

• Lucky numbers such as 6 (smooth), 8 (wealth), and 9 (longevity) are often preferred.

• Avoid the number 4, which sounds like “death” in many Chinese dialects.

Many couples choose the 8th, 18th, or 28th of a month for symbolic reasons. Just be sure it doesn’t clash with your zodiac or appear as inauspicious in the almanac.

✅ 4. Avoid Inauspicious Dates & Periods

Some days are generally avoided, even if they look fine on the surface:

• The third, seventh, and thirteenth days of a lunar month are often skipped due to traditional beliefs about imbalance or conflict.

• Avoid dates that fall too close to funerals or ancestral death anniversaries within the family.

• It’s also common to avoid marrying within the first lunar month (right after Chinese New Year), as it's seen as a time for family reunion, not separation.

✅ 5. Talk to Your Families

Even if you find a date that looks “perfect” on the almanac, it’s always a good idea to check in with parents or elders. There may be unspoken customs, family-specific traditions, or past experiences that influence how a date is perceived.

Sometimes, the most auspicious choice is one that brings peace and unity across both families.

✅ 6. Bonus: What You Wear Matters Too

Beyond the date itself, many believe that what the couple wears on the wedding day also influences the flow of luck and energy.

Wearing the Qun Kua (裙褂) or Ma Kua (馬褂)—traditional Chinese wedding attire embroidered with dragons and phoenixes—is seen not just as a nod to culture, but by some, as a form of good feng shui.

• Red symbolizes prosperity, joy, and warding off negative energy

• Gold and embroidered motifs attract auspicious blessings

• The dragon (male energy) and phoenix (female energy) represent a powerful, balanced union

Elders especially love to see the couple in these garments—often taking it as a sign that the couple is starting their marriage with reverence, balance, and intention. Plus, these outfits photograph beautifully, creating a timeless look that blends meaning with elegance.

Final Thought

Choosing an auspicious wedding date can feel like navigating layers of tradition—but at its core, it’s a way to start married life on thoughtful, intentional ground.

Whether you seek a feng shui master or take the DIY route with care, the right date respects tradition while aligning with your reality. And when paired with meaningful elements like the Qun Kua or Ma Kua, you’re not just honouring heritage—you’re wearing it with pride.

FAQ: Choosing an Auspicious Chinese Wedding Date

Q1: Do I really need to consult a feng shui master to choose a wedding date?

Not necessarily. A feng shui master can give you a deeply personalized date based on you and your partner’s birth data (Ba Zi), zodiac signs, and energy compatibility. But if you're looking for a simpler approach, using the Chinese almanac and following traditional guidelines (like avoiding zodiac clashes) is a respectful and practical DIY option.

Q2: What is the Chinese almanac and how do I use it?

The Chinese almanac, or Tong Shu (通勝), is a traditional calendar used to identify auspicious and inauspicious days for major life events like weddings. Look for dates marked “宜嫁娶” (suitable for marriage) and avoid those marked “忌嫁娶” (not suitable for marriage). It also shows which zodiac signs each day clashes with, so you can avoid conflicts with your or your parents’ signs.

Q3: Which numbers are considered lucky for Chinese weddings?

Lucky numbers include 8 (wealth), 9 (longevity), and 6 (smoothness). Even numbers are also generally preferred, as they symbolize balance. Dates like the 8th, 18th, or 28th of a month are popular choices. The number 4 is avoided as it sounds like “death” in Chinese.

Q4: What’s the significance of wearing Qun Kua or Ma Kua at a wedding?

Wearing the Qun Kua (for brides) or Ma Kua (for grooms) is considered auspicious by many and even viewed as good feng shui. Red symbolizes joy and prosperity, while gold embroidery (like dragons and phoenixes) invites blessings, fertility, and harmony. It’s a beautiful way to honour tradition and create strong visual memories—especially during the tea ceremony.

Q5: Should I avoid getting married during someone’s mourning period or after a funeral?

Yes. In Chinese tradition, it’s considered inauspicious to hold a wedding too close to a family funeral or during a mourning period (usually 100 days). This is out of respect and to avoid conflicting energies of joy and grief.

Q6: What if I’ve already booked a date that doesn’t check all the boxes?

Don't panic. While tradition holds value, your intention, harmony with your partner, and the blessing of your families matter most. If you have chosen a date for practical reasons, you can still honor tradition through other ways, like performing a tea ceremony, wearing auspicious colors, or selecting meaningful timing on the day itself.

Q7: Can The Red Wedding help with all of this?

Yes. While we don’t provide feng shui consultations or date calculations, we do offer guidance rooted in cultural understanding. Whether you're figuring out when to hold your tea ceremony, how to time traditional rituals in a modern wedding flow, or need help sourcing and arranging the Qun Kua or Ma Kua, we’re here to share knowledge that helps you make confident, respectful decisions.

We believe that tradition shouldn’t feel confusing or overwhelming—it should feel meaningful and manageable.

💡 Have questions about how to blend tradition into your wedding with confidence?

Make an appointment with us—we’re happy to share what we know, and help you bring it all together with heart (and maybe a few lucky surprises along the way). 😉